What am I afraid of so much?

Like I wrote earlier, I’m quite scared of going to travel alone. Every now and then I try to make some sense to it by asking myself “WTF are you so afraid of actually?” And those questions this scared me (who annoys me a lot btw) is thinking about are:

• What if I get lost?
• What if I run out of money?
• What if I get sick?
• The bugs. There will be a huge battle for me to learn to live with them.
• What if I get robbed?
• What if I will get lonely?
• Who will put sunscreen to my back?
• What if I want to come back home in one week?
• What if I don’t like my own company enough?
• What if I don’t enjoy it at all and will just cry in the hostel bed?

Now when I see those things written as a list, it seems ridiculous. Of course I will get lost. I’m known for my worst-ever sense of direction but who cares, what else I have there than time. A lot of time. I will get sick but I will get better as well, resting or going to see the doctor aren’t the most difficult things to do in the world. If I will run out of money I will find a job or come home. Simple as that. And I can get robbed in Helsinki as well. Or anywhere in the world.

Picture from Pinterest.
And I will cry, a lot I guess. That’s my way to react on every single situation because I’m such a crybaby. But it’s fine, it’s my kind of therapy. And it cannot annoy or confuse anyone when Im alone, so there is always the bright side of everything right?

But then there are those issues about being alone. I think those are the only reasonable fears here. I’ve always liked to spend time just by myself, but those haven’t been very long periods of time. But that’s the reason I’m leaving. I want to get to know myself better and maybe then figure out what I want to do when Im a grown-up. And I know I won’t be alone that much during my travels, I’m pretty sure I will meet one or two other backpackers on my way. And of course I can call or Skype with my loved ones anytime – thank you technology for that.

And I will find someone to put the sunscreen to my back for sure if it’s necessary.

I borrowed these three picture from Pinterest. And the cover photo as well. These beautiful views calm me down when I’m about to panic about leaving. It’s not scary, its freaking amazing.

And I’m going to survive there alone – I’m a big girl.

Picture from Pinterest.

Picture from Pinterest.

4 thoughts on “What am I afraid of so much?

  1. Olipa jotenkin ihana teksti, oot niin symppis! Pärjäät varmasti hienosti maailmalla! ❤ Sun enkkua on ilo lukea, tosi hyvää tekstiä!


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